Trumpiana: Who stole my Nobel Peace Prize!

The POTUS was peeved. Peeved with from Russia’s Putin to India’s Modi to Brazil’s Lula. Carrot or stick, pal Putin wouldn’t stop the war with Ukraine. Friend Modi wouldn’t let him take credit for stopping the war with Pakistan or call him about tariffs, all the while buying arms and oil from Moscow.

And Lula wouldn’t stop the prosecution of his predecessor Jair Bolsonaro who, like Donald Trump was in 2021, has been accused of egging his supporters to storm the seat of government after losing the election.

So after a vicious social media exchange with former Russian president Dmitri Medvedev, Trump blasted India saying, “I don’t care what India does with Russia.They can take their dead economies down together, for all I care,” and slapped 25% tariffs on New Delhi and an unspecified penalty for hobnobbing with Moscow.

Hours later after a “a very busy day in the White House working on Trade Deals,” including a dubious one with Pakistan for “developing their massive Oil Reserves,” — “Who knows, maybe they’ll be selling Oil to India some day!” — Trump gave a six day reprieve to India and 67 other nations leaving the door a little ajar for talks.

Imposing sweeping new tariffs ranging from 10% to 41%, Trump set Brazil’s tariff rate at 10%, but kept in place a previous order imposing 40% tariff on some Brazilian goods, as punishment for prosecuting Bolsonaro. He also hiked the tariffs for Canada from 25% to 35% saying its backing for statehood for Palestine will “make it very hard for us to make a Trade Deal with them. Oh’ Canada!!!”

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But no sanctions for Putin for “they may work, or may not.” With just a bit of sabre-rattling with Medvedev for his “highly provocative statements” about Russia’s nuclear capabilities, he ordered the redeployment of two U.S. nuclear submarines.

And even as his tariff agenda got a frosty reception at a federal appeals court, he proclaimed “Tariffs are making America GREAT & RICH Again,” with the White House echoing “WELCOME TO THE GOLDEN AGE ✨”

Hailing the leadership of “Deal Maker in Chief 🫡” that “has generated over $150B in tariff revenues within the past 6 months,💸” it released a picture of his with a smartphone pressed to his ear, “Making calls. Making deals. MAKING AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! 🇺🇸”

Who knows Trump may push the deadline yet again, but the shifting lines have kept the President “at the centre of the media story, where he always insists on being,” as the Guardian put it, and show America’s unmistakable clout.

It also helped Trump to almost put the lid on the Epstein saga and claim he “kicked (Epstein) out of his club for being a creep. I threw him out, and that was it.”

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“I’m glad I did, if you know the truth,” he told reporters during a trip to Scotland where he went after kicking the Wall Street Journal reporter off Air Force One and suing proprietor Rupert Murdoch for defamation for publishing a ‘fake’ story about his relationship with the disgraced financier.

Back home, he offloaded again on Federal Reserve chair Jerome “Too Late” Powell for leaving its key interest rate unchanged despite enormous pressure from Trump to lower it.

“He is TOO LATE, and actually, TOO ANGRY, TOO STUPID, & TOO POLITICAL, to have the job of Fed Chair,” he posted without revealing whether he was planning to give the boot to his own appointee before his six year term ends next May. But as one of the the central bank governors resigned on her own, he demanded that “Too Late” Powell follow suit.

Then claiming that weaker-than-expected July “Jobs Numbers were RIGGED in order to make the Republicans, and ME, look bad,” he promptly fired the head of bureau of labor statistics.

In another bid to keep his MAGA supporters and Democratic detractors away from the Epstein story, Trump wrote a series of letters to leading pharmaceutical manufacturers asking them to match the lowest price offered in other developed nations.

Earlier, as Trump embarked on a mission to tame the European Union by imposing an unequal 15% tariffs in return for none on US goods, the White House published a meme of a victorious Trump coming out of the Rome Colosseum in Rome. Accompanying it was a Teddy Roosevelt quote saying, “It is not the critic who counts… (but the) man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood …”

Rob Crilly, a Telegraph reporter who spent “five days on the road with Trump” came back revealing “a man in complete control.” And Bret Stephens, one of a self-confessed “foam-at-the-mouth critics” at the “failing New York Times” too acknowledged that “after a disastrous first 100 days, Donald Trump is starting to have a much more successful presidency.”

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Yet the carping critics were unwilling to give him any credit for his efforts to make America rich or make peace around the world.

“I have now ended many Wars in just six months — I am proud to be the President of PEACE!” he proclaimed claiming “If I weren’t around, you’d have right now six major wars going on…”

“Trump deserves the Nobel Peace Prize, but the left will never admit it” suggested an obliging opinion writer on The Hill. But as it failed to create much of a buzz, the White House took the matter in it own hands.

“Trump has brokered, on average, about one peace deal or ceasefire per month during his six months in office,” proclaimed the press secretary from the podium. “It is well past time that President Trump was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize,”

Well, not just the peace prize, he deserves another for his “Tariffic” Trumponomics and certainly one more for swagger!

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